Freedom?

FREEDOM‭?‬

is freedom‎? ‏Is it moving out of your parents house,‭ ‬doing everything you ever desired with no one to question you‭? ‬Is it going out and about having a good time‭? ‬Is it having fun or slowly killing yourself and your friends‭? ‬Having parties every weekend‭? ‬Going to the mall to get‭ '‬the outfit‭' ‬so as to be cool at the club and the DJ will notice you and play your song‭?

When I was joining college,‎ ‏freedom was all that.‭ ‬I could not wait to get my suitcase out of my dad's car.‭ ‬He had given me a ride to my new apartment next to my college.‭ ‬I kept wishing he could go away for I had a party already planned for.‭ ‬By the time my dad was handing me a hundred bill,‭ ‬I had made simple calculations of‭ ‬how much I needed for the new outfit,‭ ‬shoes and handbag.‭ ‬As he left,‭ ‬he gave me a big hug and told me,‭ ' ‬Sweetheart,‭ ‬you are on your own,‭ ‬do not forget all that we have taught you,‭ ‬good morals and prayers.‭ ‬God be with you,‭ ‬and I will always be praying for you.‭" ‬Honestly,‭ ‬deep within me,‭ ‬I looked at dad and said to myself,‭ '‬yeah,‭ ‬you better keep praying for me.‭ ‬I need prayers.‭' ‬I hugged him and said,‭ '‬Thanks daddy,‭ ‬I will be a good girl.‭ ‬I love you daddy.‭'

Barely had he got into the car than I called my friend Peris whose calls I had ignored earlier because I didn't want my dad to overhear our conversation.‎ ‏We quickly planned where to go.‭ ‬In his boyfriend's car,‭ ‬we drove all the way downtown to have the best time of our lives.‭ ‬Goodness me,‭ ‬the first club we got in was so loud that I could only read her lips to get what she was saying.‭ ‬Yes,‭ ‬his boyfriend had asked his friend to come meet me.‭ ‬Shots were drank like magic,‭ ‬the music got louder and we danced.‭ ‬My new‭ '‬boyfriend‭' ‬was overgenerous with the drinks,‭ ‬or so I thought,‭ ‬for he kept ordering for more.‭ ‬I was so naive as to what fun was,‭ ‬that I ended up drinking silly and could not take the drinks anymore.‭ ‬I needed to throw up urgently,‭ ‬and yes,‭ ‬next to my‭ '‬boyfriend.‭' ‬He was so mad,‭ ‬come to think of it now,‭ ‬he had every right to be.‭ ‬They took me to the car where they ordered me to sleep till they got back.‭ ‬After what seemed like eternity,‭ ‬they came back and we headed towards college.‭ ‬They dumped me at my apartment and I struggled to remember my door number.‭ ‬When I got in,‭ ‬I realized I had not even unpacked my stuff and so I‭ ‬had to sleep on the floor.‭

This did not stop my happy hour every Friday,‎ ‏Saturday and sometimes Sundays.‭ ‬I had to enjoy my freedom.‭ ‬Actually I got myself a real