What Are Friends For? - Division and Classification Essay

Relationships

What are Friends for?

Shanae Mitchell

10/4/2011

DIVISION AND CLASSIFICATION ESSAY

LTCA-ZEFTEL

Whenever I attend an awards ceremony or watch a similar event on television the honorees that are fortunate enough to merit the awards almost always acknowledge the people in the background of their lives The Oscar winning actor acknowledges the director, the writer, and the film crew: while the teacher of the year recognizes their spouse, the school community and their determined students who peppered them with thought-provoking questions throughout the semester. Finally, the best-selling author acknowledges her publisher, her editor, and their agent. All three individuals with very different professions have one major thing in common when celebrating their success and that is relationships. And in so stating a keen observer would perceive that friends are primary to defining our fate and it would be in our best interest to understand our relationships with the people in our lives and exactly what kind of friend they are to us.

We live in a society where friendship is often misunderstood and taken for granted. Many people are inept at dealing with others face to face and have become encumbered by the demeanor dictated on social networks. We tend to believe that everyone we've given access to view our Facebook or MySpace pages are our "friends". When in reality we do not have relationships with all of our Facebook friends. I submit to you that we all have three basic types of friends in our lives: which can be classified as true friends, acquaintances and allies. Bishop T.D. Jakes the Senior Pastor of the Potter's House in Dallas Texas refers to the aforementioned as "confidants, constituents and comrades" (Jakes...Before You Do). In his book Before You Do Jakes writes on page 15 that "good decision making in relationships...results from a process of reflection--discernment--decision". This process will allow you to examine relationships and use things like motives and boundaries to determine what kinds of friends you have.

Confidants are what I call true friends. Bishop Jakes describes this type of friend as the most loyal. Most of us would agree that a confidant is a safe place. This is the friend that you can share your thoughts with and not worry about abandonment. A true friend or confidant is for you. They add to your life, they are honest with you, they want you to achieve your dream and will do almost anything in their power to help you succeed. They love you unconditionally. A good example of true friendship can be found in works of fictions such as Gone with the Wind. The protagonist Scarlett O'Hara lacks the powers of perception and self-observation and realizes only at the novel's end that Melanie Hamilton was her best friend. She failed to realize that Melanie supported her when she rebelled against Southern Society and danced at a ball while still in official mourning. Melanie stood by her when she became a female entrepreneur after the war. Melanie was ready with sword in hand prepared to kill when Scarlett's life was threatened by a trespassing Yankee soldier.

In the Bible Ruth was a true friend to her mother in law Naomi. Although Naomi had nothing more to offer the young woman (she was old and her husband and sons dead) Ruth followed her to Judah, knowing that she would not be respected by the people of that country. Naomi implored her to return home but instead Ruth responded "where you go, I go...your God will be my God and your people will be my people"(NIV Bible Ruth 1). Her actions spoke louder than her words, she labored every day to care and provide for Naomi out of love and devotion. The same could be said of Jonathan in the book of Samuel. He was devoted to David. They were confidants. David was safe with Jonathan. Jonathan protected David from King Saul even