How to Dance - for Average Guys

How to Dance - For Average Guys

Dancing is one of those inescapable facts of life. It comes up over and over again in social situations. You might was well learn to do it. It's smoother sailing once you know how and it tends to score you points in lots of situations.

You don't have to reach a particularly high standard

You just need to be good enough that you can get on the dance floor, blend in with everyone else, not look like an idiot, and not feel too uncomfortable while you're there (lots of people are at least somewhat uncomfortable with dancing, that's why they have to get a few drinks and wait for some other people to be on the dance floor first.)

When someone (read: one or more girls) wants to dance with you, all they really want is that...

You are there with them

You are dancing with them

You are not dancing horribly

Being better than the minimum never hurts of course, but just knowing the basics will put you way ahead of all the non-dancers out there.

Girls and guys have different ideas of what a "good dancer" is

Guys often see dancing as a skill to show off. Being 'better' than other dancers is important to them. Their typical image of a good dancer is a gymnastic break dancer doing a bunch of flips, or a guy doing a fancy, fluid Popping and Locking routine.

A girl's picture of a good dancer is a closer to a passably moving guy who looks comfortable, confident, and like he's having fun. Lots of girls have told me I'm a "good dancer" (i.e., I'm actually dancing, and not like a total fool), but not many guys have.

Don't worry about what guys think. Sometimes guys will snicker and point to people who are dancing because they're really just uncomfortable about doing it themselves. Random dudes sucking on their beer aren't your audience.

Let me emphasize. I am not a great dancer if you compare me to the guys you'd see dancing in a music video. I'm not even great compared to lots of other people in whatever club I go to. But I'm good enough to get by.

If there's one thing to keep in mind it's to be toned-down and low-key

Don't be a spaz and try to pull off some crazy moves unless you 100% know you'll look good doing them. It's better to reel yourself in. Over reaching and being 'that guy' is worse than blending in and being a bit boring and unoriginal. Don't feel you have to pull off tons of new moves every second and put on a show for everyone. It's okay to dance in a simple, repetitive way and just enjoy your friends' company.

If you're not comfortable dancing, do not take the route of dancing extra badly on purpose 'as a joke'. Everyone sees through this and it's not even that funny, just kind of embarrassing.

Basics:

* Move to the beat. Don't know what I mean? Go get some music and listen for the underlying, repeating thump-thump-thump pattern. Every style of music has different speeds.

* Bend your knees to bounce up and down to the beat.

* Kind of move your arms around as you bounce.

* That's about as basic as it gets.

The best way to learn is to just practice

Get in front of a mirror, put some good music on, and start dancing to it. Remember, if your instinct is to jump around a lot or be a bit spazzy, consciously tone yourself down. A lot of the time on actual dance floors you won't even have that much room anyways, so if you only practice moves that requires a lot of space you'll be put in an awkward spot when you end up somewhere a lot more crowded.

Whenever you're bored and hanging around by yourself, just put some music on and dance around. One way to practice at first is to try working on one aspect of dancing at a time, then putting the pieces together:

* Keep everything else still and just bounce on your knees in different ways.

* Try bouncing up and down on your toes in different ways.

* Keep your legs and arms still and move your torso up and down, back and forth.