Leadership and Self Deception-Getting out of the Box

The book Leadership and Self Deception-Getting out of the Box explores how we at times view and treat other people as mere objects to help us accomplish our personal goals ("in the box") instead of viewing others as people with their own hopes and dreams ("out of the box"). When we are "in the box" we limit our ability to reach our full potential and we limit our obligation of seeing others as they are....as people. "Self-betrayal", is the basis of self-deception, because it is an act contrary to what our sense is of what is appropriate and how we should be toward other people. When we are self-deceived we 1) inflate our own virtue, 2) inflate the value of things that justify our self-betrayal, and 3) inflate others' faults and 4) blame others. Self-betrayal leads into of self-deception.

When we view ourselves as self-justifying we create false images of ourselves and we are in viewed as in the box. We then see the people who challenge these images as threats and those who reinforce these images as our allies. Being in the box we view others merely as objects, and not as people. The book suggests that we can't truly focus on results if we are in the box and focused on ourselves...by doing so we spend out time selfishly focusing on getting only our own results, and not accomplishing what's best for the organization as a whole.

Problems with being in the box include: lack of commitment, conflict, stress, poor teamwork, and lack of trust, lack of accountability and communication issues. When applying these concepts in the workplace, it important to effectively challenge the box images in order to achieve the best results. The false images will not only affect how we treat others they will also lead to low production in the workplace. To get out of the box, we should do our best to help others succeed and achieve results, whether personally or professionally. Success as a leader depends on being free of self-betrayal and creating an environment of openness, trust and teamwork, where people work hard for the collective good, not individual accomplishments. Individuals who are in the box fail to recognize others as individuals too, and are mainly focused on their own values and goals. When this happens, it creates a barrier to success both with yourself and with the relationships you have with others. People should also try to work together with an understanding of how to appreciate one another without assumptions.

Having interpersonal skills constitutes having great communication skills. It also means a person must have the required interactive skills such as listening, and speaking. There should also be a sense of awareness of others. Good interpersonal communication can only be done when a person in outside the box. A good communicator is a persuasive person. In order to be considered persuasive a person must have an influential character which attracts people. Being an effective leader requires persuasiveness, and knowledge.

An effective leader can not expect positive results if they are not willing to communicate with their followers. Effective interpersonal connections require engagement. Being in the box will not produce an effective outcome. In most cases frustration will occur when people are in boxes because they will not be able to successfully relate to each other on a personal level.

Since I was never made aware that I was in the box, I never really thought of the ramifications of being in the box. Realizing that I have issues and working on those issues is my goal while I continue my life journey. I have the desire to see people as they are and not as objects so I guess that is a good place to start. When I look back over my life experiences I can recall a lot of instances when I treated people as mere objects which enabled my ability to find ways to relate or interact with them. It is not always easy to think outside the box because it requires involvement. To be honest I find it safe being in the box because I am not required to really care. Wow that sounds horrible! Aren't we