Leadership and Self Deception

1. What is "the box"?

In "Leadership and Self-Deception," the box is the author's metaphor for the self-deception that causes people to view themselves and others with a systematically distorted perception. Rather than taking into consideration the needs, wants, and motivations of others, a person in a box acts primarily on behalf of his or her own interest, be it consciously or subconsciously, and thinks of other people as objects.

One example in the book is the story of Gabe and Leon in Chapter 5. Although Gabe went through the traditional motions that should increase collaboration, he was unsuccessful. The explanation provided is that Gabe was in a box and focused on his personal motivations and not honestly thinking of Leon's needs, so the desired results were not achieved.

2. How do we get into "the box"?

People get into the box through self-betrayal which is when a person acts contrary to how he organically feels he should act. Once an initial act of self-betrayal is committed, the person in the box justifies his behavior by inflating his virtues while accentuating the other person's flaws.

A person stays in the box by subconsciously identifying and hoping for others to provide examples that support the image created by the box. One example of this is when Kate was disappointed when her son made his curfew because it invalidated her justifications.

Once two parties are in the box, a cyclical destructive relationship is created as the behavior inside their individual boxes creates conflicts and provokes ongoing "in the box" behavior and blame towards each other (see Appendix, Figure 1).

3. How do we get out of a box?

A person gets out of the box by not betraying her innate instinct of how she should treat others. This is accomplished by ceasing to resist others, thinking of individuals as people with commensurate needs of equal priority, and by accepting responsibility and ownership of actions to prevent self-betrayal and self deception. As one becomes out of the box more frequently, it is easier for him to stay out of the box and apply that mentality to other situations. Additionally, people tend to get out of the box more quickly the less they are in the box.

4. What is the problem of self-deception?

The problem with self-deception is that people don't realize when they have a self-deceiving viewpoint and are in the box. If they don't realize they are in the box, then they are not able to objectively identify their role in the problem, which hinders them from communicating effectively. Many organizations have this problem, which causes damage to careers, companies, and employees.

5. What did the book say about the nexus among business ethics, team