Human Development

I always wanted to be a psychotherapist, since I was adolescent, I come from a medical background family and there is one of my family members that I really admire, he is a very good and successful psychiatrist with his own clinic. He is a great person, very centred, balanced, serene, tolerant, and incredibly intelligent. Another reason that I decided to start psychotherapy and counselling course is a opportunity to be more aware of my own feelings and personality, be more centred, perceptive and I am very surprise and happy how quickly this been happened to me. First I had the naive idea that the counsellor role is to "give advice" and help someone with some kind of issues.... I was wrong; the counsellor role is much vaster and far more complex.

"Analysis does not set out to make pathological reactions impossible, but to give the patients ego freedom to decide one way or another" p.50 - 1923

Sigmund Freud

"In my early professional year, I was asking the question: How can I treat, or cure, or change this person? Now I would phrase the question in this way: How can I provide a relationship which this person may use for his own personal growth" p.98 - 1961

Carl Rogers

I could notice few and very important changes with myself and others; First of all with my judgemental attitude, thing that I used to consider "normal" and a "natural" human characteristic. If we are aware that people may have different backgrounds, culture and past history we will be able to be more understanding and non judgmental. Try to put yourself in someone's situation and try to see from someone's point of view can help a lot, perhaps is not easy but is definitely effective. For example, we had a role play where the scenario was a woman who was a mistress of a man that had suddenly died and she could not attend at his funeral to say the last goodbye, because his wife and kids didn't know about her existence. She felt very lost, lonely, grieved but she couldn't have anyone's support, because of her situation. In other times I could really judge this woman, and let my feelings be revealed, but using my "new"counselling skills I could see and feel her situation in other point of view, accepting without judgement and criticism, sympathizes and be genuinely concerned. I had to be very aware as well about my body language and face expressions, especially because this subject is rather delicate and she had to feel comfortable and not criticized.

"The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suit all cases"

p.45 - 1933

Carl Jung

"Being entirely honest with oneself is a good exercise" 1897

Sigmund Freud

Another example, last week I had a very big argument with someone close to me and my first thought was how can he been so selfish and cruel with me, I felt very disappointed and deeply hurt, and after two days thinking, reflecting about the vast options, about the subject I finally asked him to talk again about and I could genuinely understand his point of view and then realize how I made a big deal of it, and that I really did not have any reason to feel so bad, hurt and disappointed. Because from his point of view influenced by bad past experiences, culture and background, was very natural for him to think like that. And after listening to him with full undivided attention, without interrupting, watching his body language, and very important: I created a comfortable and relaxed environment, so I could after all that, explain MY feelings and point of view to reach a agreement between us.

"The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed" p.49 - 1933

Carl Jung

Another big change in my life was the fact that for the first time ever I could share with someone something that happened to me when I was only 6 years old and I believe had a big impact in the way I deal with a particular area in my life. I could remember how I used to blame and punish myself when I was 6 to 9 years old and also I spent few years of my life trying to be brave to share that with someone. Now I can genuinely understand and accept that and also I could share with few trustful people. And also this helped me to listen without judgment.

My ability to listen to others had change, I used to not pay much attention sometimes when talking to someone, because