The Importance of Romance in Long-Term Relationships

The real romantic knows that the creative flow of romance keeps passion and intimacy alive in a long-term relationship. Without passion and intimacy we simply walk the path of being involved in an act of compassionate love.

C.S. Lewis points out that love encompasses four types of love: (1. Storge - Affection, 2. Philia -Friendship, 3. Eros - Passion, and 4. Agape - Charity). Storge, Philia and Agape are important in any relationship, but Eros is the key to creating a truly passionate, intimate and long-term relationship where the butterflies in your stomach do not become a distant memory.

Our hearts beat 100,000 times a day and the hearts never ceasing rhythmic motion of opening and closing is loves voice. There is nothing more creative than romance to increase our heart rate to keep a long-term relationship alive. Being enchanted by your partners unique personality, shows that they truly care for you, embracing all your talents and flaws.

Romance has a different hue for all of us and that's unique to humans. If we all followed a standard pattern we would be disappointed and bored. How lovely to get that surprise bouquet that made you feel gosh they know what I like and I didn't even have to ask or hint at it - Even if this might be just a thought swirling in our minds, it does pull our heartstrings, just thinking about this possibility! Similarly, we can be thrilled by that spontaneous expression of affection in private or public. At other times it is just that genuine care shown for your friends and family by the one you love.

Relating to one another is how we connect to our true self and purpose in life. This is part of the self-actualizing process involved in relationships but more so in long-term intimate relationships. We go through trials and tribulations, but in addition, we also blossom and grow closer, through the expression of love in romance; making it crystal clear that the trials and tribulations are worthwhile in the grand scheme of life.

Long-term relationships must be nurtured by both partners making time for each other to remind themselves of why their hearts bonded. Psychologically, the uses of enchantment, are enormously positive. Fairytales such as Cinderella and Little Red Ridding Hood, are 'models of human behaviour and by that very fact do give meaning and value to life. For children fairytales allow them to fantasize about what the world really is like from a safe distance and understand human nature. As the famous psychologist Bruno Bettelheim would said: "Children get more solace from a fairytale to cope with disappointments than the comfort received from an adults viewpoint or reasoning". As we get older we get to grips with the reality of life but nevertheless we do not lose the core truth that our lives are fairytales in those moments when we truly connect to another being and share our love.

Romance,