Business English Assignement

CRANEFIELD COLLEGE OF PROJECT AND PROGRAMME MANAGEMENT

INDIDUAL ASSIGNMENT 3

FOR

MODULE: Advanced Business English (M7)

CASE STUDY: Formal Explanations

DATE: 13 June 2017

“I hereby declare that this assignment is entirely my own work, and that it has not previously been submitted to any other Higher Education Institution. I also declare that all published and unpublished sources have been fully acknowledged and properly referenced. This includes figures, tables and exhibits. Where modified by me, this has also been indicated.”

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1. FORMAL EXPLANATIONS

(1) Entrepreneurial leadership is a blend of entrepreneurship and leadership.

Entrepreneurialship leadership encompasses the characteristics that an entrepreneur possesses and practices (2) whenin starting an enterprise (3) and the.lLeadership (4) that motivates and influences people by providing an inspiring environment for them to achieve organisational goals.

1. The initial intention of the first sentence was to emphasize and introduce the concept of entrepreneurial leadership as a fusion of two separate concepts namely, entrepreneurship and leadership. “According to Scocco (2014: Online), the first sentence constitutes a tautological fault of style; it needlessly repeats the same idea conceived in the second and third sentence.” The use of the first sentence in this context does not add value since it vaguely explains that ‘entrepreneurial leadership is a combination of the qualities of entrepreneurship and leadership’. However when reworded, the combination of the second and third sentence clearly explains the same concept that was stated in sentence one. (Correction)
2. “According to Cambridge University Press (2017: Online), the word ‘in’ is a preposition that talks about where ‘something is in relation to a larger area around it’.” The intended meaning was to show a connection between the characteristics that an entrepreneur should possess and practice to the time of starting an enterprise. The usage of the word ‘in’ is incorrect in this context. “According to Cambridge University Press (2017: Online), the word ‘when’ as a conjunction means ‘at the time that’.” It is appropriate in this context since the clause ‘starting an enterprise’ is a subordinate clause, which is linked by the word ‘when’ to the main clause ‘the characteristics that an entrepreneur possesses and practices’. This clarifies the time at which an entrepreneur should possess and practice certain characteristics. There has to be a link between the subordinate clause and the main clause to complete its meaning. (Correction)  
3.  The initial intention of separating the concept of entrepreneurship and leadership as two separate sentences was to avoid the consecutive use of the word “and’ in a long complex sentence. However, it does not clarify the meaning that entrepreneurial leadership incorporates the characteristics of entrepreneurs and leadership under one umbrella. The period or full stop is no longer needed in this context after the word ‘enterprise’ since two separate sentences are being combined together to form one single sentence. Naturally, all words that do not begin the sentence have to be in lowercase letters therefore ‘Leadership’ becomes ‘leadership’. The word ‘and’ is the coordinating conjunction that connects the two separate ideas of entrepreneurship and leadership as one sentence, which defines the concept of entrepreneurial leadership. The word ‘the’ is the definite article that specifies the noun ‘leadership’ in this context. (Correction)
4. “According to Cambridge University Press (2017: Online), the word ‘that’ is a relative pronoun used to introduce the defining relative clause. A defining relative clause comes immediately after the noun it describes.” The relative pronoun in this context clearly defines the subject ‘leadership’ of the verb ‘motivates’. “According to Cambridge University Press (2017: Online), when the relative pronoun is the subject of the relative clause, we do not use another personal pronoun or noun in the relative clause because the subject (underlined) is the same.”

(5) Entrepreneurial sStrategies employed by the three entrepreneurs, (6) (Bill Gates, Luke Johnson and John Caudwell,) portray key dimensions of entrepreneurial leadership. 

1. The adjective word ‘entrepreneurial’ starts the sentence to describe the plural noun ‘strategies’. However, it is superfluous in this context since the sentence is already talking about strategies used by ‘entrepreneurs’ that reveals important characteristics of ‘entrepreneurial’ leadership. Therefore, there is no need to repeat the word ‘entrepreneurial’ at the beginning of the sentence to describe the type of strategy further. This is a tautological fault of style. The new sentence now starts with the word ‘strategies’, therefore the first letter of the word has to be capitalised. (Correction)
2. “According to Scribendi Inc (1997: Online), the Brackets (parentheses) are punctuation marks that are used, within a sentence, to include additional information. The supplementary information included in the brackets is not essential to the main point and if removed, the meaning of the sentence would remain unchanged. This means that the material in the parentheses should not be grammatically essential for the surrounding sentence to make sense. Therefore, the initial intention of using brackets in this context was to provide additional information about the three entrepreneurs. The brackets showed a list of their names and if the information within the bracket was taken out, the sentence would still make complete grammatical sense; ‘the three entrepreneurs portray key dimensions of entrepreneurial leadership’.” However, in this context, the names of the three entrepreneurs are important and have to be included in the main sentence as a list naming the three entrepreneurs. The comma is the punctuation mark that separates important nouns listed in the main sentence. The last serial comma after John Caudwell is essential to clarify that the verb ‘portray’ refers to the subject ‘strategies employed by the three entrepreneurs’ and not just to ‘John Caudwell’.(Correction)

(7) These Kkey dimensions include:

•  (8) having establishing and communicating the vision to engage teams that will identify, develop and take advantage of business opportunities;
• (9) motivatinged to takethat business-related risks be taken;
• (10) embracingprefer change and innovation (11) in achievingto achieve a competitive lead;
• and (12) contending aggressively with other firms to dominate and add value to the market.

1. The previous sentence talks about ‘key dimensions of entrepreneurial leadership’ and in this sentence ‘key dimensions’ was placed without a determiner; hence, it is not clear whether the ‘key dimensions’ talked about in this sentence refers to that of entrepreneurial leadership or any other type of ‘key dimensions’. “According to British Council (2014: Online), a determiner tells whether the noun phrase is specific or general. The word ‘these’ is the plural form of the determiner ‘this’; it refers to people or things that are near. In this context, ‘these’ is a demonstrative adjective that modifies the noun ‘key dimensions’ by indicating that it refers specifically to the previous sentence (‘key dimensions of entrepreneurial leadership’).” The word ‘key’ no longer starts the sentence, ‘these’ starts the sentence, and the first letter of the word that starts the sentence has to be capitalised. The ‘key dimensions of entrepreneurial leadership’ are listed using semicolons instead of commas because the list consisted of clauses that were too long. This seemed more appropriate and visually appealing to a reader because the first clause in the list already had commas in them and separating the items with additional commas would have been confusing. However, there were too many items separated by semicolons in one sentence, which makes it exhausting for the reader; a colon acts as a more formal pause to introduce the list. It emphasizes the list by visually separating the list from the surrounding text and indicates that the reader should look forward to information that follows on from the earlier statement. A colon placed after “include” sets up and introduces a bullet list. (Correction)
2. “According to Get it Write (2017: Online), the bullet points draw the reader’s attention to important information by placing it in a vertical list with no particular ranking order. This helps the reader to identify key issues and facts quickly. The usage of punctuation marks and style of writing is kept consistent when using bullets. The colon introduces items in the list after the lead-in word ‘include’. The first letter in the starting word of each item in the list is not capitalised. The semi-colon is used at the end of each item to separate the items in the list since these items contain clauses and one of the clauses already contains a comma. All items in the list complete meaningful, grammatically correct statements when read with the sentence that leads-in the list.” The word ‘having’ is the present participle form of ‘have’, which in this context means to own. The initial intention of using ‘having’ in this context was to say that ‘one of the key dimensions of entrepreneurial strategy is to be in possession of a vision and the ability to communicate that vision’. The word ‘having’ in the continuous form is normally not used to express ideas such as possession; only the base form ‘have’ is used for that purpose. The word ‘having’ is used to express an activity that is in progress. In this case, it was inappropriately used alone before the word ‘and’; it does not express an activity that is in progress. The word ‘establishing’ is the present participle form of the verb ‘establish’ and clarifies ‘one of the key strategies as the act of setting up and implementing the vision. All of the items in the list need to have a consistent logical and grammatical structure. This means that all bulleted items in this list have more impact when they start with the same word class (part of speech); in this case, all items in the list are subordinate clauses that start with a present participle. (Correction)
3. The adjective ‘motivated’ is the past tense and the past participle of the verb ‘motivate’. In this context, it means the condition of being influenced by entrepreneurial strategies. The adjective ‘motivating’ is a present participle, which in this context means the process of influencing entrepreneurial strategies. The word ‘motivating is more appropriate to start this subordinate clause since it conforms to the same word class (part of speech) consistency used in the other clauses of the lists. (Correction)
4. “Prefer’ is a verb that means to choose something over another, however in this context, there is no choice shown to select any other option other than change and innovation. The base form of the verb ‘prefer’ also does not conform to the same word class consistency followed in the other bullets. The word ‘embracing’ is the present participle of the verb ‘embrace’, which in this context means to accept change and innovation enthusiastically. The word ‘embracing’ is more appropriate to start this subordinate clause since it conforms to the same word class (part of speech) consistency used in the other clauses of the lists. (Correction)
5. The word ‘achieving’ is the present participle of the verb ‘achieve’. The definition of ‘achieving’ is the activity of bringing about or reaching a desired objective successfully. Since the present participle form of the verb ‘embrace’ is used to start the sentence, it expects an infinitive verb to follow the word ‘embracing’ instead of the present participle ‘achieving’. The word ‘achieve’ is an infinitive verb that means to successfully bring about or reach (a desired objective or result) by effort, skill, or courage. Certain verbs expect certain kinds of arguments to make logical sense and the verb that follows the preposition ‘to’ will always be infinitive. (Correction)
6. The conjunction word ‘and’ should have been used after the next-to-last item in the list and a period after the last item. In this case, that correction is not shown. The word ‘and’ is incorrectly used at the beginning of the last item in the bulleted list. (Correction)

All three entrepreneurs demonstrate that the drivers of (13) a successful entrepreneurial strategy rest with the (14) ‘four I’s’, namely imagination, ideas, invention and innovation. (15) The three entrepreneursThey applied their nine key personal characteristics to successfully implement their entrepreneurial strategies and pursue the four drivers. (16) These pPersonal characteristics include:

• the ability to focus on task completion;
• dedication to long working hours;
• self-motivation for (17) realising starting initiatives without support;
• resilience against probable setbacks;
• confidence and assertiveness in making proposals;
• information-seeking and eagerness to learn;
• being (18) attuned to seeking strategic business opportunities;
• (19) team- building commitment;
• and (20) receptiveness to changes in technology, customer and supplier demands.

1. The word ‘a’ is an indefinite article determiner that is used before a noun to refer to any single thing that has not been mentioned before. The indefinite article will precede an adjective when followed by a singular, indefinite, countable noun. The word ‘a’ precedes words that begin with a consonant sound. ‘Successful’ and ‘entrepreneurial’ are words that begin with consonant sounds, and are adjectives that describe the noun ‘strategy; hence they require the indefinite article ‘a’ to show that the adjective refers to the singular, indefinite, countable noun ‘strategy’. (Correction)
2. Quotation marks, also called 'inverted commas', are of two types: single and double. American style uses double quotes (“”) for initial quotations, then single quotes (‘’) for quotations within the initial quotation. “ According to The Punctuation Guide (2017: Online), British style uses single quotes (‘’) for initial quotations, then double quotes (“”) for quotations within the initial quotation. American style places commas and periods inside the quotation marks, even if they are not in the original material. British style (more sensibly) places unquoted periods and commas outside the quotation marks. For all other punctuation, the British and American styles agree: unless the punctuation is part of the quoted material, it goes outside the quotation marks. Quotation marks can be used to emphasize a specific word or letter that is unfamiliar.” In this context, ‘four I’s’ is emphasized with single quotation marks to show significance to the fact that the four drivers for a successful entrepreneurial strategy all start with the letter ‘I’. (Correction)
3. Starting two or more consecutive sentences with the same subject is superfluous; in this context, the subject ‘three entrepreneurs’ is repeated needlessly. The word ‘they’ is a pronoun that replaces the repetitive use of the noun phrase mentioned in the previous sentence. In this context, it becomes the subject of the verb ‘applied’ and refers back to the noun phrase, ‘three entrepreneurs’. (Correction)
4. The previous sentence talks about ‘nine key personal characteristics to successfully implement their entrepreneurial strategies’ and in this sentence ‘personal characteristics’ was placed without a determiner; hence, it is not clear whether the ‘personal characteristics’ talked about in this sentence refers to nine mentioned  earlier that deals with entrepreneurial strategy or any other general type of ‘personal characteristics’. A determiner tells whether the noun phrase is specific or general. The word ‘these’ is the plural form of the determiner ‘this’; it refers to people or things that are near. In this context, ‘these’ is a demonstrative adjective that modifies the noun ‘personal characteristics’ by indicating that it refers specifically to the previous sentence. The word ‘personal’ no longer starts the sentence, ‘these’ starts the sentence, and the first letter of the word that starts the sentence has to be capitalised. The ‘personal characteristics’ are listed using bullets instead of commas because the list consisted of too many items that made the sentence lengthy and exhausting for the reader. The colon acts as a more formal pause to introduce the list. It emphasizes the list by visually separating the list from the surrounding text and indicates that the reader should look forward to information that follows on from the earlier statement. A colon placed after “include” sets up and introduces the bullet list. (Correction)
5. ‘Starting’ is the present participle of the verb ‘start’, which means to begin doing something. ‘Realising’ is the present participle of the verb ‘realise’, which in this context means to achieve something important that is needed to be completed. ‘Realising’ then refers to the activity of achieving the initiatives to fruition. Both these words can be used correctly in this sentence; however choosing the most relevant verb to define the action of the noun, makes writing clearer, stronger, more effective, and more interesting. ‘Realising’ is a more specific and appropriate word in this context, which vividly conveys the impact of achieving an initiative, than the word ‘starting’. (Correction)
6. The word ‘attuned’ is the past participle and the past tense of the verb ‘attune’. In this context, the tense of the past participle does not match that of the bulleted list. It also does not make sense when combined with the lead-in sentence, ‘these personal characteristics include’, of the bulleted list. The language style of all other items in the bulleted list is in the present tense and it is important to keep the style consistent. ‘Being’ is a progressive form of the verb ‘to be’ and is a present participle in the present continuous tense. When ‘being’ is used in front of the past participle ‘attuned’, then the structure of the clause is in the passive form of the present continuous tense. In the present continuous tense, ‘being’ says that it is happening now in a continual manner. The subordinate clause now makes sense with the lead-in sentence and is a consistent style with the other items on the bulleted list. (Correction)
7. The original phrase ‘team building commitment’ implies that the team (noun) is building (verb) commitment (noun), however this is not the intended meaning. The intended meaning was to suggest that personal characteristics include the commitment to build a team. The hyphen placed between the noun ‘team’ and the present participle ‘building’, forms the compound adjective ‘team-building’ that describes the noun ‘commitment’. The hyphen prevents the misinterpretation of the compound adjective to describe the noun via a single thought. (Correction)
8. The conjunction word ‘and’ should have been used after the next-to-last item in the list and a period after the last item. In this case, that correction is not shown. The word ‘and’ is incorrectly used at the beginning of the last item in the bulleted list. (Correction)

One can (21) hence identify seven key competencies and leadership lessons that empowered the three (22) entrepreneurial leaders to establish their new businesses, which subsequently (23) lead to their success and development. These competencies (24) awere: to have vision, (25) and to be innovative, charismatic, proactive, creative, inclined to experimentation and (26) preparedone to takeing strategic risks.